I, mayhaps wrongly, always have considered myself someone that gives themself to someone to act as a sounding board, personal theapist, or just a good friend. I think I still believe that, but it’s always painful when a friend is having problems and I have been around to see the beginnings of what could have been great, but fell into the red.
I gave a friend some advice toward a relationship, this without knowing the other person involved. Didn’t work out the way I thought/hoped it would, at least, not yet. I honestly don’t know if it will change… I hope though, that they can still remain friends, and build upon their friendship. Looking back at it, it might be a good thing since he is moving away, but I don’t think that makes it any easier for her to accept.
I dealt with something very similar in HS… only I never took the initiative to start anything beyond friendship, and everytime I got the balls to, it was too late. *shrugs* probably a good thing… we stayed pretty good friends for a while, and I’m not sure if she would have stayed a friend if I had tried to progress down that dangerous road. I told her about it years later, and it turns out it probably was definately the right thing to do. Unfortunate, but it was probably one of the last conversations I had with her. 🙁 Not sure, but I don’t think the last conversation you want to have with a friend is the one where you confess you had a multi-year long crush on them. I could be wrong though.
This isn’t to say I’ll stop trying to help people through their problems, or continue acting as a sounding board…. infact, this is something I’m doing to get my thoughts in order. I let down a friend by giving shoddy advice (without knowing the whole situation, al la knowing the other person). I went with what I had and could get… I should have done more research or kept my mouth shut… but when I see a way to help a friend gain some happiness in their life… I become a little blind to certain aspects of logic and reason. Something to work on I suppose.
Thanks for staying a friend, and that goes for all of you who I might (have) led astray once or twice (or many more times, depending on who you are). This isn’t to use as an excuse, but everyone must struggle with their humanity, and sometimes that means missing the mark and therefore making a mistake that hurts more than oneself. I do this… we all do this. Let’s just make sure it doesn’t get between friends and/or family.
I think that’s it for now…